Baggie

If only I could resist.

To supplement my meager freelance income, I recently started a job in a large company's marketing department. The corporate world is more stable and secure even if it feels like the walls of my cubicle are sucking the very life from my soul. But that's what they pay me for. The actual work I do for free.

The thing about large corporations is that when they send out e-mails regarding their policy, they have to write them as if their employees are dumb as tree stumps because, let's face it, some of them have IQs that rival that of an ice cube.

Today one of the ice cubes sent the e-mail. It reminded people of the company's definition of casual business dress. Among the prohibited items: Excessively baggie garments.

Normally I don't notice such things because normally I don't read e-mails from the HR department -- precisely because I will see something ridiculous like this and I will not be able to fight my compulsion to comment.

At least I had the wisdom not to reply to everyone in the company when I sent my reply:

Please note: "Baggy" describes loose fitting clothing. A "Baggie" is a plastic thing you put leftover food into.

"Excessively baggie garments," while theoretically possible, are probably not anything you have actually seen anyone wear.

I was also pleased with myself for not pointing out that far more unprofessional looking than excessively baggy clothing are excessively snug fitting garments and yet these weren't mentioned among the list (yes, a list) of the verboten wardrobe items.